Dad, Tell Me About the Time (40)

Monday, September 16, 2024

What is the best gift you ever received?

Several years ago, Lisa and I received a Christmas gift from our kids. It was a photo album with several random pictures taken when the kids were young, and the pictures were reenacted by them as adults. We both absolutely love it. It sits on our coffee table in the front room, and it is the first thing we show visitors who come to visit us. Some day I will scan the pictures properly but just so you can get an idea of the book, here are pictures I took of the pages.

Amir

Sunday, September 15, 2024

Last night I went with the missionaries to teach a young man named Amir. Amir was a great example of everything I love the most about the gospel. 

He is very affected by all the evil in the world. He can’t understand why we have wars. Why would one nation attack another nation and what do they hope to gain by doing so? Why is there so much hunger and poverty in the world? He is grateful that he lives in what is possibly the safest and most affluent country in the world, but he is convinced that all the politicians are corrupt and stealing money from the masses to build up their own power and influence. He loves technology but he is convinced that great technology is being hidden from us. It was difficult to teach him anything because he would continually interrupt us to share one more fear he has. It was endless. The poor guy was tormented.

We agreed with him that there is great confusion and evil in the world and we agreed that without some outside help it would be impossible to know what to believe or to find any peace. We testified to him that there is only one source of truth and peace. He needed to pray to Heavenly Father to learn what he should believe and what not to believe.

He told us that there is a man who preaches that to pray is to give someone else control over your life. He said he believes him. We asked him why he would believe that man but not believe anyone else? We assured him that anyone who tells you that praying is evil, is wrong and we taught him how to pray and why it is important to pray in the name of Jesus Christ.

We challenged him to avoid the internet for a week to keep the confusing voices out of his life and to find a peaceful quiet place where he could go to pray vocally, privately and uninterrupted. We challenged him to give thanks for everything he loves about his life and to ask God for peace, ask if the book of Mormon is the word of God and if the missionaries are sent to him by God. He said he would do that for a month.

We promised him that if he would study and pray with an open mind and a sincere desire to know what is true, then God would answer his prayer, and the Holy Spirit would witness to him the truth of what he was asking. We promised him that he would feel the influence of the Holy Spirit in his heart, and he would have peace.

As we were teaching Amir, I couldn’t imagine living a life of fear and confusion like he is doing. I worry about everything Amir worries about but because of the gospel I can live a life of peace with confidence in the future. I am grateful for the peace that the gospel gives me. For the companionship of the Holy Ghost that helps us discern truth from error.

I testified to him that the gospel is a source of great joy to me and that he could have that same peace and joy in his life. It was obvious that he wants that so dearly, I only hope that he is able to block out the negative voices in his life long enough to find that peace.

--------------------trivia--------------------

In prehistoric times 3 out of 4 people died from hunger

Today about 1 in 20 people die from hunger

In mideaval times 1 out of 4 people died at the hands of another human being

Today about 1 in 300 people die at the hands of another human being

-----------------------------------------------

Dad, Tell Me About the Time (39)

Wednesday, September 11, 2024

What have you grown to appreciate most about your spouse?

Her devotion to her children.

What is the best way your spouse shows you they love you?

Doing things for you.

Where is your favorite place to spend time together?

It seems like there should be a better answer to this, but at this point in our lives, I think being home alone with each other is what we like the best.

There is one thing that we love to do together and that is to take short outings together. Whether it is a trip to the beach, to Sea World, the Midway Museum, or a short trip up the coast. We love doing things together.

I guess to answer the question of “where is our favorite place to spend time together” the answer would be… Our favorite place is with our kids. We love doing things with our kids and grandkids. We loved the Disney Cruise, visiting the Martin Handcart memorial, visiting the Fort Worth Stockyards, Magnolia, running Ragnars, the Snow Canyon Half, the Wyoming half, the Spartan, hikes into Snow Canyon and around Phoenix, floating the Salt River, touring Germany and the WWII battle sights. We love doing anything with our kids and grandkids.

Dad, Tell Me About the Time (38)

Tuesday, September 10, 2024

What is the key to being happy in a marriage?

If you are more concerned about the welfare of your spouse than you are about your own welfare then you will always be happy. Every marriage will have its ups and downs and if both partners in the marriage are worried about themselves then they will often feel like they are getting the short end of the deal. If both partners are more worried about their spouse then even if their spouse is having a bad day they are being cared for. It might get rough if both partners are having a bad day but hopefully that doesn’t happen too often.

What do you wish you had known before you got married?

I’m not sure what I wish I had known, but the one thing I have struggled with my whole life is listening. I am much better at it than I was forty years ago but I have a tendency to worry more about what I’m going to say next than I am about what the other person is saying to me. What I need to do is listen intently to what the other person is saying and after they have said their piece then think about what they said before I respond.

By doing this you not only hear what the other person is saying, but they can tell that you are listening. I have often thought it would be cool to be able to read other peoples minds but truly listening to them is almost as good. This is the best way to know what they are thinking. A good listener can eventually learn to read between the lines and know what the other guy is truly feeling.

Being a good listner is always good but it is truly amazing with your own family members.

When you first met your spouse, what did you think?

In the following order I thought:

1) This girl is cute
2) This girl is friendly
3) This girl makes my heart speed up
4) Too bad this girl isn’t older
5) Who cares how old she is

Who initiated your first kiss? How and where did it happen?

Didn’t I already talk about this? Fine, I will talk about it again.

It was in Lethbridge after one of our very first dates. We had parked in front of Lisa’s grandma Ahmeads house and we were talking. I leaned in for a kiss and she did respond and it was a nice kiss but then she hit me.

After she hit me she was kind of embarassed and then she kissed me. I think it was very confusing for both of us.

What feature of your spouse were you attracted to initially?

The thing that I love most about mom, even today, is the thing that attracted me to her the moment I met her. It is also a “skill” that I am not very good at. While it is still one of the things I love most about mom, it is at the same time one of the things that can be most frustrating.

Mom can be anywhere and with anyone and she instantly strikes up a conversation and in a short time, she can know everything about them and about their family. I think that is amazing. It happens in lines, at parties and at work functions. I will stand in that line for hours and not say a word. Mom will be their new best friend.

While I think it is amazing, it can be frustrating. We can be at some meeting and at the end of the meeting mom gets talking to some complete stranger and an hour after the meeting is over, she is still talking. Meanwhile I’m about ready to fall asleep on my feet.

Dad, Tell Me About the Time (37)

Thursday, August 30, 2024

How long was it from the time you met until you were married?

The first time I spoke to Lisa was in late August 1979 and we were married July 11, 1981. That makes it one month shy of two years.

How long were you engaged?

I proposed Dec 24, 1980 and we were married July 11, 1981. So, six months and seventeen days.

How did you propose to your spouse or how did your spouse propose to you?

My proposal was nothing too romantic. It was December so everything was frozen and we didn’t want to go for a walk in sub zero weather so I pulled into a parking spot that had a beautiful view of Henderson lake and asked her if she would marry me. She said yes. It isn’t like this was a surprise or anything. We had talked about marriage for some time. She even did help me pick out the ring. This is a picture of Henderson Lake. 

I guess when Mom and I were there it probably looked more like this.

Describe your wedding day.

My wedding day is a bit of blur. The wedding was in the morning and Lisa was staying at our house and we had a ton of friends who came down from Edmonton with us. There wasn’t much for the groom to do but Lisa was surrounded by a swarm of women making her even prettier than she normally is.

After the wedding we held a lunch at our house. The lunch was mostly for the older relatives who were reluctant to travel to Coalhurst where the reception would be that evening. The weather was perfect and we were all enjoying outselves and visiting each other. I remember that Uncle Lloyed came up to Lisa and told her that they were the only smart ones there because they were the only ones wearing hats. Uncle Lloyd always wore a big cowboy hat where ever he went.

We held our reception in the Coalhurst School because Lisa’s family needed their coffee and that wouldn’t have been allowed in a church building but we chose not to serve alcohol. That was mostly because we had been to many weddings on Lisa’s side and they all end up drunk and very crude. We decided to keep them sober. The school didn’t allow alcohol anyway so it worked out well. Plus, alcohol is very expensive. It was a good idea but in the end Lisa’s uncle Murry ended up serving alcohol out of their trucks in the school parking lot. It didn’t become a problem.

We served a full on roast beef dinner and it was a perfect evening. We also had a program with various family members singing songs or telling embarassing stories. At several times during the program, Gregs oldest son Michael, was dressed up as a robot and would walk across the stage holding various parts from my car such as my air filter cover, my distributor cap, a hub cap. You get the idea. I was getting nervous because I was the last one in my family to get married and at every single wedding except Gregs and Dixies we had hotwired their car. We didn’t hot wire Dixies car because Mark is the one who taught us how to hot wire a car and Greg got married before I met Mark.

After the reception I was certain that they had hot wired our car but I couldn’t find a wire anywhere. I finally just decided to take my chances and we started the car without getting electrocuted. I was quite surprised however when I pulled out of the parking lot and as I tapped my brake the horn went off. They had wired the horn to the brake lights.

A couple of weeks later we had a second reception in Edmonton for Lisa’s family and friends who couldn’t make it to Southern Alberta. It was held at the 5th ward chapel and was very similar to the reception in Coalhurst.

I think we had about 300 people at each reception. We were very loved.

For The Strength of Youth

Monday, September 2, 2024

In the Bishopric, the member of the bishopric who is conducting will be the first to bear his testimony on that fast Sunday. For me, it is probably the scariest part of being in the bishopric. Yesterday was Fast Sunday and I could not come up with anything to talk about in my testimony. The meeting had already started and all during the sacrament I was saying a prayer asking for some guidance of what I could talk about. Suddenly I knew exactly what I should say.

A couple of weeks ago was Stake Conference and the visiting area authority was Elder Marin. His first comment in the leadership session was, “Are you enjoying your callings”? I remember when he said that my first thought was, “yes”. I am enjoying my calling. And a big part of that is because I work with the youth.

I shared that in my testimony and then went on to talk about how great the youth in our ward are. I shared some specific examples and then mentioned how I was able to go with the youth on a baptism trip on Saturday morning. We had to get up before 5:00 am and we had at least twenty five kids there and maybe more. The spirit was strong during the baptisms and the kids were amazing. It is great to see the youth actually performing the baptisms and being witnesses. It was a great trip. I then bore my testimony about the reality of God and Jesus Christ and the atonement.

Unknown to me, was that the youth had all agreed together that they would all share their testimonys in yesterdays meeting. Immediatley after I sat down, about seven young men got up and bore their testimonies, when they were done several more of the youth got up and that is how it went until we were ten minutes overtime. When I tell this story it comes across as a prank but these testimonies were sincere and the spirit was strong. I think only three adults were able to get to the pulpit. It was an amazing meeting.